Delinquent Bridal Blogger - Bridal Edict Part 1

Hello, my name is City Bride and I'm officially a delinquent bridal blogger.

I know I have been absent for some time, but I promise to update you on what I've been up to during my hiatus. Part of this time has been spent navigating the highly-charged, emotion-filled last-minute details - getting people to actually say yes or no, figuring out where to sit everyone, convincing my planner that I really can't wake up before prior to the double-digit morning hours.

In this time I've discovered that every person's concept of what is and is not acceptable when considering a wedding (or anything) is completely different, and is almost always completely different from yours.

Here are some misconceptions that I've observed in preparing for my own wedding and from participating behind the scenes in a number of others. I call this my bridal edict or City Bride's 9 Theses:

A Wedding Is Not a Family Reunion
While I am sure it would be nice to see Cousin Pookie after all these years, a wedding is not the place for this reunion because (1) if you haven't seen Pookie since your family's Cosby Show finale party you won't really miss him at this event and (2) you won't be able to pick Pookie out of the crowd, let alone have any time to catch up on what's been going on in your lives. You're probably more up to date on Rudy and Theo, and should wait until a more opportune time to reconnect

A Wedding Is Not a Class Reunion
Just like the case of Cousin Pookie, you won't miss your 6th grade violin teacher Ms. Fuller or your 11th grade biology lab partner if you haven't been in contact all this time. Again, this day is meant for people that have been and will continue to be instrumental in your lives - not people that would be "nice to see." Catch up with Ms. Fuller and your lab partner over coffee next time you have some free time.

A Wedding Is Not a Prom
I was never one that assumed I could bring a date to a house party or BBQ (see below) out of consideration for the host - call me crazy. Why people assume they can bring their latest fling to your WEDDING is really beyond me. Clearly, spouses, fiances and long-term / established relationships are an exception. But if you are single leading up to someone else's big day, please don't confuse the wedding invitation as a challenge for you to find a date - any date - by the time the event rolls around. And if you do genuinely find a special someone after you get your invite, check in with the bride and groom and see if it's okay if they tag along.

A Wedding Is Not a BBQ
Now, before I continue let me be clear: there is nothing wrong with a BBQ or a wedding that is a BBQ. I only mean that no, you can't just pop up at your leisure with whomever you please whenever you please like you might in the case of the July 4th BBQ when you are dealing with someone's wedding.

You know how it can be on those summer holiday weekends - Oh, I have three different BBQ's to get to. I'll just get to Stacy's an hour or so late since I have to go to the other two, pick up my dry cleaning and stop by the mall. This sort of casual approach may be okay for an unchoreographed, free flowing event. A wedding is not that event. Again, even a casual, BBQ wedding is orchestrated with lots of thought and care - you can't just show up willy-nilly, an hour late. Either come and enjoy the day with the bride or send your regrets.

Stay tuned for more...