Delinquent Bridal Blogger - Bridal Edict Part 1

Hello, my name is City Bride and I'm officially a delinquent bridal blogger.

I know I have been absent for some time, but I promise to update you on what I've been up to during my hiatus. Part of this time has been spent navigating the highly-charged, emotion-filled last-minute details - getting people to actually say yes or no, figuring out where to sit everyone, convincing my planner that I really can't wake up before prior to the double-digit morning hours.

In this time I've discovered that every person's concept of what is and is not acceptable when considering a wedding (or anything) is completely different, and is almost always completely different from yours.

Here are some misconceptions that I've observed in preparing for my own wedding and from participating behind the scenes in a number of others. I call this my bridal edict or City Bride's 9 Theses:

A Wedding Is Not a Family Reunion
While I am sure it would be nice to see Cousin Pookie after all these years, a wedding is not the place for this reunion because (1) if you haven't seen Pookie since your family's Cosby Show finale party you won't really miss him at this event and (2) you won't be able to pick Pookie out of the crowd, let alone have any time to catch up on what's been going on in your lives. You're probably more up to date on Rudy and Theo, and should wait until a more opportune time to reconnect

A Wedding Is Not a Class Reunion
Just like the case of Cousin Pookie, you won't miss your 6th grade violin teacher Ms. Fuller or your 11th grade biology lab partner if you haven't been in contact all this time. Again, this day is meant for people that have been and will continue to be instrumental in your lives - not people that would be "nice to see." Catch up with Ms. Fuller and your lab partner over coffee next time you have some free time.

A Wedding Is Not a Prom
I was never one that assumed I could bring a date to a house party or BBQ (see below) out of consideration for the host - call me crazy. Why people assume they can bring their latest fling to your WEDDING is really beyond me. Clearly, spouses, fiances and long-term / established relationships are an exception. But if you are single leading up to someone else's big day, please don't confuse the wedding invitation as a challenge for you to find a date - any date - by the time the event rolls around. And if you do genuinely find a special someone after you get your invite, check in with the bride and groom and see if it's okay if they tag along.

A Wedding Is Not a BBQ
Now, before I continue let me be clear: there is nothing wrong with a BBQ or a wedding that is a BBQ. I only mean that no, you can't just pop up at your leisure with whomever you please whenever you please like you might in the case of the July 4th BBQ when you are dealing with someone's wedding.

You know how it can be on those summer holiday weekends - Oh, I have three different BBQ's to get to. I'll just get to Stacy's an hour or so late since I have to go to the other two, pick up my dry cleaning and stop by the mall. This sort of casual approach may be okay for an unchoreographed, free flowing event. A wedding is not that event. Again, even a casual, BBQ wedding is orchestrated with lots of thought and care - you can't just show up willy-nilly, an hour late. Either come and enjoy the day with the bride or send your regrets.

Stay tuned for more...

DIY Weekend

This weekend my mom, aunt and cousins came up for a visit to find a mother of the bride dress, bridesmaid shoes for my little cousin and to CRAFT ourselves silly. Mission accomplished on all fronts!



I thought I'd share some of the DIY crafts we completed so far:

Here are our out-of-town guest bags for guests staying in one of our hotels

The pomanders turned out so nice! These little ones will be part of our altar decorations.

These larger flower pomanders will decorate our pews.

Headbands for our flower girls - that's my knee not a bald head like my mom thought in the photo.

Flower girl headband propped on a Kleenex box.

Not only did my family get all of this done, they took more stuff with them. I have the best family in the world and I'm so glad they are going to be a part of our special day.

Wedding Wednesday - Coming to America

Does this really need an explanation?

I guess this is sorta cheating because it's not really a wedding, but this is the part of Coming to America when Eddie Murphy's Prince Akeem first meets his bride (Vanessa Bell Calloway). Who among us has not belted out She's Your Queen to Be?



We all know he eventually marries his true love, Lisa McDowell, in spite of his adventures in Queens, their parents and the rats. If you didn't already know that, shame on you.

Invitations Update

Those invite reply cards are trickling in!!! Thanks, everyone!

People are even using our website - how 'bout that? Keep up the good work.

Invitations - Check!

Invitation by Bella Figura

We finally got our invites out the door!

These invites have so many parts - maps, travel info, reply cards - and they are tied together with pale aqua belly bands.

Belly Band - a thin paper strip that holds all of the invitation components together. This is another term I didn't know before this wedding.

Our wedding colors were solidified after I saw the invitation set by Bella Figure pictured above. It is printed in letter pressed red ink and wrapped with a bright aqua band. I loved it, but I didn't love the price.

Our invites - pardon the weird lighting, but you get the idea.

Many thanks to Reaves Engraving in Laurinburg, NC (featured in every bride's must-have book Bridal Bargains and close to my hometown) for the amazing and FAST job.

Wedding Wednesday - Muppets Take Manhattan

FI's favorite wedding scene is from The Muppets Take Manhattan. Before you judge (and I judged at first), hear him out:

It's an emotional rollercoaster for a little kid. They all go their separate ways and then when they all come back together, Kermit has amnesia. Then at the wedding Kermit remembers - well, Miss Piggy beat it into him - and everything worked out.

"Somebody's getting maaaaaarried!"

"Because you share a love so big, I now pronounce you frog and pig."

If you don't know what this means, check the clips below.

And right now, FI is giggling because he's so tickled with that scene. This is one of the many, many reasons I love him so. He's so not too cool for school. Or the Muppets.

DIY – Paper Pomanders

First Photo: oncewed.com, Laurie Canotto

Second and Third Photo: vintageglamblog.com, Amanda

FI and I have been affected by the economy like so many others – we got notice that his work term will end in November after 8 years on his job. We still have a wedding budget and are doing better than many others, but we’re looking for ways to cut dollars.

Our plan is to cut our wedding spending overall to make sure we still have funds after the ceremony. One idea is for me – crafty me – to handle the ceremony décor. And since I’m allergic to everything, including flowers, I’m looking at making some version of a paper / ribbon pomander to hang on the pews.

What’s a pomander? A flower ball. Don’t worry, I didn’t know what that was before this wedding.

Tell me what you think?

Inspiration Boards

FI and are getting married on Saint Simon’s Island in Georgia. This “Golden Isle” is rich and history and just one of our favorite places to be. Also, FI’s parents live there so we get the benefits of a destination wedding with the inside scoop of a local.

Since we are getting married, everyone assumes we’re going to have sea shells and sand dollars and turquoise and pink. Not so much.

And not that there’s anything wrong with that. We decided to go in a less-expected beachy direction, focusing on color and texture to give the wedding an island feel without being to kitschy. Our colors, pale aqua and coral red, help us do that. What do you think?

Photo 1 - Martha Stewart Weddings

Photo 2 - mood board created by the bride, featuring photos from theknot.com, Hayley and Jason's wedding

Wedding Wednesday - Whitley and Dwayne

You will quickly learn that I’m a touch obsessed with pop culture. In a bad way. Like, I can sing nearly every TV theme song, I keep up with who is dating whom in the MTV, BET and, heck, TV Land sets and just know too much useless information about too many useless things. (SIDENOTE – I know some useful stuff, too. I don’t want to paint myself with too broad of a brush, you know).

In honor of that obsession, I would like to present my first Wedding Wednesday where I highlight pop culture weddings, real and in the world of film and television, that I love to revisit.

Whitley and Dwayne: A Different World: Save the Best for Last, Part 2

Oh, how we all had been rooting for them to get together all along. Even when Dwayne was obsessed with Denise, I thought they’d make a cute couple. I could see through his flip up glasses and her matching suits that she wore to class in college. They completed each other. Her bourgeoisie and his Brooklyn made for a perfect pair.

After Dwayne cheated on her during their engagement, I was crushed. I understood his frustration with the circus that their wedding was becoming (MESSAGE!!!), but I was furious with him. Still, I knew he’d learned his lesson and that they’d find their way back to each other. It didn’t matter if Whitley was distracted by the Senator / Congressman / Mayor Byron (whatever he was). Nothing - not an elected official or Kinu – could keep them apart.

NOTE: Dwayne’s behavior – cheating and busting up her wedding – is unacceptable in real life. That sort of thing would only work on TV. But Whitely’s fabulousness, Diahann Carroll as Whitley’s mom trying to marry her off and away from Dwayne and that cry of “Baby Please!” from Dwayne as they try and carry him out of the ceremony. TV magic!

Still, if that were real life, someone would have been swinging and everyone at the ceremony would not have been clapping – at all.

Love Songs

One of my DIY projects is signs for my table numbers. Each table will be named after a song lyric since FI and I met in our college and choir and we LOVE music. In my quest for table "names" I have re-discovered so many songs and discovered some others.

In Honor of the King of Pop, here is one of my favorite songs by the great Michael Jackson. Listen carefully and you'll hear where Usher, Ne-Yo and many others get their inspiration. And it's written by Stevie Wonder, so you can't go wrong there.

Michael Jackson - I Can't Help It
Written and composed by Stevie Wonder and Susaye Greene.

Looking in my mirror
Took me by surprise
I can't help but see you
Running often through my mind
Helpless like a baby
Sensual disguise
I can't help but love you
It is getting better all the time

I can't help it if I wanted to
I wouldn't help it even if I could
I can't help it if I wanted to
I wouldn't help it, no

I can't help it if I wanted to
I wouldn't help it even if I could
I can't help it if I wanted to
I wouldn't help it, no

Love to run my fingers
Softly while you sigh
Love came and possessed you
Bringing sparkles to your eyes

Like a trip to heaven
Heaven is the prize
And I'm so glad I found you
You're an angel in disguise

I can't help it if I wanted to
I wouldn't help it even if I could
I can't help it if I wanted to
I wouldn't help it, no

Calligraphy - Schmalligraphy

FI and I are hastily trying to get our invitations out the door. I am busting through our invite list and addressing invites, no small feat.

Since I'm typically fairly crafty I figured I could teach myself to calligraph (is that a word?) my invitations. Then I bought some short-cut, cheater calligraphy pens - the kind with no ink insert, sort of like a marker. I was primed and ready to go, and let's just say the result was not so great.

Now, I'm using those fancy pens I bought but without the technique. They're coming out, um, okay. I'll post photos of the end result.

Save the Date!

So, if you're checking this out you know that my hubby-to-be and I are furiously planning for our Georgia wedding in the fall.

Above is our DIY, vintage save-the-date postcard. Well, they were sort of vintage - we actually got them printed but to look vintage. I got the idea from a couple on the knot (their on-line bio got moved, or else I'd show you, but here's an example of one along with ours. My fiance did a good job with printing, right?